Most people agree that cheating on a significant other is wrong. Yet Hollywood often portrays infidelity as glamorous, such as in Netflix’s “The Noel Diary,” the number one movie on Netflix in November 2022. Movies like this lead many audience members to celebrate, support, and even cheer for love stories that stem from infidelity.
The problem is not necessarily the cheating itself we watch in movies, but the romanticization and encouragement of the cheating. Many movies have the audience on the edge of their seats rooting for infidelity, while neglecting the grave immoral action that it is.
Hallmark movies, such as “The Christmas Card,” are examples of the normalization of infidelity, especially since most of them have the same plot: A woman is engaged to or seriously dating a man she does not connect with. She falls in love with another man who makes her truly happy, all while still being engaged. She flirts, sneaks around, and sometimes even kisses the new man, while her fiancé knows nothing about it. Many of the movies end in the woman starting a new relationship before she has broken off the one she’s in. Although these movies are cheesy, and it may not seem like a big deal, movies have a great impact on human emotion.
The Chicago Tribune published an article in 2011 highlighting the benefits of watching movies. Psychologist Birgit Wolz, quoted in the piece, “Because many films transmit ideas through emotion rather than intellect, they can neutralize the instinct to suppress feelings and trigger emotional release. By eliciting emotions, watching movies can open doors that otherwise might stay closed.”
Even if it is subconsciously, movies play an important role in one’s emotional state. Watching movies that encourage spouses and boyfriends/girlfriends to cheat is not healthy for anyone.
If a man or woman is engaged to a person they do not truly love, they should have the decency to break off the relationship before starting a new one. That is not rocket science.
“The Notebook” is an example of the romanticization of unfaithfulness. The two characters, Allie Hamilton and Noah Calhoun, fall in love when they are young. They break up after Allie moves away and she becomes engaged to another man. Allie and Noah reconnect and spend the night together, even though Allie is engaged to be married. The movie has the audience rooting for the couple to be unfaithful and eventually that is what happens. Their love story is portrayed in a beautiful light, but it is derived from immorality.
The movie industry is perfectly capable of creating entertaining, passionate love stories without having one person be unfaithful to write a supposed fairytale.
“He’s Just Not That Into You” is an example of a movie that portrays cheating as the filthy thing that it is. Characters Ben and Janine are married college sweethearts who just moved into a new apartment. Janine is discussing plans for a baby nursery room while Ben is secretly having an affair. At the end of the movie, Janine learns of the affair, initiates a divorce, and Ben is painted as a scumbag. It should be common sense that if someone cheats, it is a bad thing, and thankfully the producers did a good job of portraying the gravity of the situation.
It is understandable that engaged or dating couples may fall “out of love.” These couples should feel no obligation to stay with each other if they do not truly love each other, especially if someone in the relationship is being mistreated or disrespected. But no matter how bad a relationship is, two wrongs never make a right. Cheating is always wrong, even if it is understandable.
Our world is fixated on quick problem solving, but that mentality cannot be applied to relationships. What many movies fail to portray is that true love takes work and grit. Despite the hardships and the differences, two people can come together as one and fight for each other until their last breath. That is the type of love story the movie industry should portray.
