When I enrolled in Justin Jackson’s Dostoevsky course last spring, I had little idea how this course would endlessly complicate my life. I’m glad I allowed it to.
Near the close of Dostoevsky’s novel “The Idiot,” the leading women meet in a horrible confrontation — tempers flare and damaging words fly. Each woman paints a portrait of the other’s character while battling over the affections of Prince Myshkin. But these descriptions bear no resemblance to the images Myshkin himself has painted for the reader. These images provide views of pride and pettiness, shame and contempt. The prince’s figures are formed by love.
In Jackson’s class this fall, the reality of this scene and this work took shape before my eyes. These women choose not to see the world or each other through the eyes of the prince, and the result, the novel itself, is tragic.
Never again will I be able to make a quick judgment about a situation, a person, or a circumstance and not question with whose eyes am I seeing this drama unfold. This nagging awareness of reading the world with the eyes of Myshkin will remain with me long after this course and my time at this school ends.
Our course catalog speaks to the wealth of courses offered at Hillsdale that could enrich and, yes, complicate our lives. But enrolling isn’t enough. If we choose not to engage, we choose not to be engaged. If we choose not to invest time and effort, we choose to miss out on something like reading the world through the eyes of Myshkin.
We too often forget that we came here to be changed by these courses; we came here to see through new eyes like those of the prince. We feel like we are beating the system when we receive a good grade without effort. But have we cheated the system or ourselves if we pass a class that we did not allow to complicate our lives at all?
