Dear Kate,
I recently got engaged. While it’s nice to have finally taken that big step, it’s very hard to be in the state of relationship limbo now. The next step is marriage, and until then I feel like we’ve plateaued! Meanwhile, I’m swamped with wedding plans along with my school work. To make everything worse, my single friends don’t offer much sympathy. How do I cope during this terrible waiting period?
Thanks,
Very Impatient
Dear Impatient,
Life is hard for everyone. Some people are poor, some people have bad health, others are just lonely. Fortunately for you, you’re biggest problem is the stress of waiting and planning for the happiest day of your life. I don’t understand you people. You’ve found your soulmate, you’ve got someone by your side who will stick with you in thick and thin, and yet you still want the rest of the world to cry with you when everything isn’t just perfect for the two of you. Life is never easy, I know that. I know that all of your problems don’t vanish when you fall in love. But stop rubbing your happiness in other people’s face and calling it misery! You’re just impatient. How spoiled are you when you have to complain about waiting a few months to get what you want. It’s like a child whining because Christmas doesn’t come soon enough. It’s annoying! We’re all happy for you. Now be happy for yourself. And that goes for everyone in relationships, not just those of you who are engaged. Use the time of waiting to practice discipline. There will be incredibly hard times during your marriage, no need to manufacture some right now. You’re in college, you’re in love, you’ve got it all —or at least you’ve got what counts: good friends, time to read good books, and a wonderful person by your side. Make up your mind about the flowers at your wedding (because that’s your biggest issue to deal with) and ask your single friends about them for a change, rather than moaning about your own minuscule problems, like being engaged.
