20 signs you’re a real Hillsdale student

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Study Break
September 7, 2018July 12, 2022By Allison Schuster
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20 signs you’re a real Hillsdale student

 

Central Hall is a constant in every Hillsdalian’s life. (Courtesy)

Aside from being admitted, paying tuition, and taking classes at Hillsdale College, there are certain qualifications that make one a tried and true Hillsdalian. Only a real Hillsdale student has experienced the following.

  1. You’ve face-planted on the ridiculously uneven sidewalk of Manning.
  2. You’ve been caught checking yourself in the extensive Heritage Room window.
  3. You sweat excessively as soon as you spot Hillsdale College President Larry Arnn walking into the dining hall.
  4. You’ve witnessed a line stretching from one end of campus to another, anxiously waiting for the library to open on Sunday afternoons.
  5. You’ve been hit by a stray golf ball from a game of statue golf. Also, you know what statue golf is.
  6. You’ve scoured all of Lane, Kendall, and the library only to find every room reserved by a single person or by a lone backpack. You fall to your knees in defeat. Guess you’re not passing Philosophy in this lifetime.
  7. The only way you know the difference between Bastiat and the other two poly-econ authorities is that Bastiat has better memes. You know, the memes that the one kid keeps putting in the Google doc while the rest of you are trying to actually create a study guide.
  8. You’ve spent more time standing in line for omelettes than you have studying for all your exams combined. Spoiler alert: your omelette fell apart.
  9. You’ve gotten heat stroke in Olds. You think this is a joke, but it’s happened.
  10. You find Bon Appetit mugs in your house even though it’s in another state and you don’t remember bringing mugs home.
  11. You call it saga instead of Bon Appetit, because all the older students indoctrinated you on the first day of orientation.
  12. You quote Aristotle as if you’ve done any of the assigned readings before.
  13. You’re either #TeamYAL or #TeamYAF. There is no in-between.
  14. You’ve nearly been hit by a car trying to cross the street from Olds Residence to Galloway Residence.
  15. You’ve successfully gotten out of a parking ticket from the security office.
  16. You only attended President’s Ball (and Welcome Party and Garden Party) for the chicken tenders. Also then you made it very well known on social media with a caption something along the lines of #CameForTheNugs.
  17. You’ve been chilled to the bone by the thought of finally rising to senior status and getting that free Don Tocco poetry book.
  18. You’ve marveled at the large size of the athletes all crammed onto one couch in the student union watching a daytime episode of ESPN.
  19. It is the end of the semester. You just need a coffee for your last study session but the guy in front of you at AJ’s doesn’t want to waste a penny of his “Charger Change,” so he buys three egg salad sandwiches, two Arnold Palmers, six Kit Kat bars, and one pack of gum, doing the math in his head just to eat off Charlie the Charger’s dime in whatever way possible. Oh wait now he’s taking away the pack of gum because it’s six cents over.
  20. You’re crying in AJ’s because you related to this article so hard.
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