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In his piece “Ladies, be traditional. Ask a guy out,” Blake Schaper argues that it is traditional for women to initiate relationships and ask men out, referencing medieval and Victorian-era practices. He blames modern dating apps for the dehumanization of men and the refusal of women to give them a chance.

I agree with Blake that modern dating apps have made dating difficult, with people settling for external appearances rather than character or virtue. It isn’t fair, however, to shove the obligation of asking someone out on women. Maybe in the medieval era women handed out symbolic handkerchiefs, and maybe Victorian women wrote love letters, but the ideal of the romantic tradition has been the man pursuing his beloved, not the other way around. 

Not only does having the responsibility of asking someone out and going through the process of planning dates reinforce a man’s confidence, it also makes women feel pursued rather than pressured to pursue. 

Men, you shouldn’t be comfortable with women asking you out. No great love story features a strong, fearless woman pursuing her beloved but passive man.

Be confident, courageous, and manly, and maybe you’ll get a date. 

Mary Schlueter is a freshman studying the liberal arts.