Donuts and Discourse

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Donuts and Discourse
Grace Cool and Aidan Cyrus host Necessary Society at their off-campus houses. Courtesy | Andrew Dixon

If you’re looking for thoughtful discussion, new people, or just a simple Saturday brunch, Necessary Society is an open door for anyone interested.

Alumna Reagan Antonio ’20 began Necessary Society as a way of bringing people together on the weekends to cultivate conversation and enjoy a meal. Now, Antonio has passed the tradition on to her sister Grace Cool, a current junior, who co-leads the group with junior Aidan Cyrus.

Antonio founded the group with the Catechism of the Catholic Church in mind, quoting “Society is essential to the fulfillment of the human vocation.”

“It’s all about fostering conversation among people that don’t really talk,” Cool said. “Reagan’s idea was, instead of going out on Friday nights and only having the party option, let’s have an opportunity where you can meet adults and get to know people that you might not know.”

Last Saturday, off-campus house Casablanca was filled with nearly 25 people ready to converse over brunch. Dozens of chairs lined the living room, and stacks of cinnamon rolls filled everyone’s plates as they settled into the cozy atmosphere.

“We aren’t trying to make it develop into just a finer things club,” Cyrus said. “We’re really just having an organic conversation.”

Each week Cool and Cyrus decide on a new topic of discussion. They are not necessarily “push-button topics,” said Cool. Instead, there have been topics such as cremation, arranged marriages, the importance of localism, and this week’s topics: alcohol and celebration.

“Today we will be discussing the many aspects of alcohol,” Cyrus said at the start of Saturday’s brunch. “What is the purpose of celebration? What does it mean when you throw a party, and what does it say about you?”

Laughter flooded the room as Cyrus began the conversation with a poem, “Be Drunk,” by Charles Baudelaire. But the last line of the poem lit a spark for the topic: “be drunk, be continually drunk! On wine, on poetry or on virtue as you wish.”

“Why make merry?” offered senior Marcus Lotti.

Cyrus set the stage by arguing that society attempts to demoralize joy and deny celebration, and many voices agreed that true celebration is necessary as an attempt to push back on culture.

“Celebrating is intrinsic to our human nature,” sophomore Matthias Rhein said. “We’d be denying our nature if we didn’t take joy in the things around us.”

“But what about people who drink to get a sense of liquid courage?” countered Cyrus.

Conversation shifted into whether or not people grew up with alcohol in their homes, the measure and purpose of being drunk, and even elements of drinking in “The Odyssey.”

Students considered the way they were brought up in regards to alcohol, some affirming that they were grateful it was normalized in their household as most students are afraid to even discuss it openly with their family.

“Young people are afraid to talk to their parents about drinking because they know it’s wrong or it’s illegal,” sophomore Regina Gravrok said. “They feel like they can’t even be open about it. If someone has alcohol poisoning no one wants to call an ambulance even if they’re literally dying because there’s underage people there.”

Rhein argued that the home is the safest place to be exposed to drinking, while some students said they had never even seen their parents drink growing up.

As the morning continued, Cool passed out a second round — of cinnamon rolls— and the conversation slowly dwindled into separate side conversations, resulting in the authentic and organic conversation that Cyrus hopes to achieve each week.

“It always surprises you that you might not know someone here on campus, but then you’re like, ‘Wow we agree on a lot of really fundamental things and I wouldn’t have known that if I hadn’t had brunch with you this morning,’” Cool said.

Necessary Society is always open to new students without any type of commitment.

“Bring a friend and bring a dish,” Cyrus said. “Then, just observe and listen if you want. There is no obligation to converse or say something, you can just show up and enjoy it. And if it’s something you’re interested in, come back. It’s as simple as that.”