In Focus: A renewed appreciation

Home Culture In Focus: A renewed appreciation

As I was beginning my eighth year learning the art of singing, my body forced me to stop.

Every attempt at a deep breath ended in a sharp pain in the center of my chest.  It constantly felt like a little fat man was sitting in the center of my chest weighing me down so my attempts to suck air in were even more difficult and painful.

This was last October.

I had been taking private voice lessons since fifth grade.  Shortly after I started, my voice teacher recognized the operatic nature of my voice and began giving me songs to suit my voice.  As I progressed, I sang arias from famous operas and developed the technical skills to allow me to take on more and more difficult pieces.

This led me to sing arguably one of the most technically difficult soprano arias called the “Doll Song” from Offenbach’s “The Tales of Hoffmann” for my high school senior recital.

I came to Hillsdale intending to continue improving and growing my voice to tackle more difficult pieces and expand my repertoire.  I started private voice lessons and joined choir with full intentions of pursuing a minor in music focused on vocal performance.

Then October hit.

My health difficulties came seemingly out of nowhere.  I first noticed the problem when I would walk up a flight of stairs in Lane and be out of breath, something that shouldn’t happen to someone in moderately good shape (yes, I could probably have used some more exercise…but I wasn’t that out of shape).

From there, the pain increased and my breathing became progressively difficult.

Singing starts with a breath. Air is the support on which all vocal production rests.  As my breathing became more and more labored and painful, I started to grasp the terrifying reality.

I couldn’t sing anymore.

I vividly remember the day I admitted it to myself.  I was sitting in my room in pain, and I said aloud to no one but myself, “if I can’t sit here and breathe, I can’t sing.”

I had to stop one of my most beloved hobbies, drop the minor, and deal with extreme pain.  Over winter break, I got tests done on every possible culprit: my brain, heart, lungs, skeleton, blood.  Everything came back saying I was healthy.  This was little comfort.

My doctor sent me back to school saying to take painkillers and suggesting I see a chiropractor or acupuncturist.

I suffered through spring semester in pain, hoping one day I would wake up and miraculously be fine.

When summer came, I finally decided I needed to do something.  I visited a chiropractor.  When I explained to him my symptoms, he looked at me and said, “Lie on your back.”

One adjustment was all it took, and I took my first pain-free breath in nearly eight months.

When I sang on the first day of choir this year, I hadn’t realized the toll the absence of singing had taken on me.  As  I sang those first notes after months of not being able to, I felt whole again.

While hearing a beautiful piece of music has the ability of stirring one’s soul, for me, singing has that effect.  Producing that beautiful music is an incredibly fulfilling experience.

I now have a renewed appreciation for the gift God has given me.  Though it’s cliche, you really don’t appreciate what you have until it’s gone.

It is a gift to be able to pursue what I love, particularly when it has such a profound effect on my life and those around me.